Dude, my boy c***** and I hooked up with Asian sisters last night in the same room
Then I put on blue by Eiffel 65 and security showed up and yelled at us for being too loud. Also, they stopped fucking because no one can fuck to eiffel 65
I feel odd... a had sex with a chick and she keept her socks on...
So... I just got back from the chiropractor... And he said I have a slight neck injury from head banging too much. Fuck yes.
just saw a dude in a v-neck sweater on a bike drinking starbucks. way to feed the stereotypes white dude.
You and I should start a club for people who woke up on outside on a bench with no idea how they got there.
you really dont want me to drink and drive. you saw what i did to my face and that was only from walking
We were squawking at each other for over an hour like chickens. Literally. Never touching the stuff again and never again showing my face at that Denny's.
Ok so I could say "im sorry"...but instead ill just say "unsupervised...jager...military guys...green school bus called the juice box...and HUGE dick"
Somehow me showing up to/breaking into her house only to find I was a week early for the party became a night of weed cookies and sex.
I almost itched my nose with the lit end of a cigarette. Help.
I hope you get a lego stuck in your dickhole
Sexting and pancakes... It's going to be hard to top that
Whenever a guy asks me why I like weird sex stuff, I just answer, "Catholic School".
I'm hungry and horny. DEADLY COMBINATION.
I'm with the cops, Trish's gay husband stabbed himself and is framing her for attempt of murder and I'm dressed 4 the club I'm wearing leather pants leather jacket leather boots and black club top. Embarrassed
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