ok shes still asleep, should i pee on her and say she did it herself? and by the time you respond to this ill probably have already made the decision
you'd think he'd be slightly more humble with a penis that small
They're donating plasma together for extra money. Couple of the fucking century.
don't worry about the poodle she's always like that. she's like 14 years old and ate a bag of weed when she was a puppy.
you puked out of a dead sleep and didnt wake up
How can you turn a kayak date down? I'M TALKING RIVER HEAD HERE.
I think for all the guys in my phone, I'm going to change their pictures to pics of their dicks. It's easier to identify them that way.
3pm strippers are depressing
I'm not judging you. Just know that you could be Queen of The World. Instead you're 5:28 p.m ponging. I hope you're at least winning
I will always make you feel special and slightly offended. That's my job.
It was a book called Gay Safari.
I'm so happy for you now that you have found your perfect porn novel.
Why is my car covered in what appears to be salsa verde?
Idk I was embarrassed that I hit it too hard so I played it off by spitting out bong water like a 'whales blowhole'
I'M TRYING. TO WATCH. PORN. PLS HAVE UR IMPORTANT DISCUSSIONS ELSEWHERE FUCKERS
Is it bad form to puke out of a dorm window to avoid looking bad in front of the people in your room?
How about from a sixth floor window?
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