People in love make me want to vomit
You know you are bi when you flip between the NFL Network and LOGO.
She referred to her collection of sex toys as an "arsenal." I'm not sure whether to be scared or excited....
alcohol. turning childhood friends into awkward hookups since the dawn of civilization.
You know, be my cock's hype man.
No i peed with you in the toilet. The guy I high fived was mid pee in front of the urinal
I just want to point out that nothing makes my hickie/hangover more obvious than sleeping in a scarf and sunglasses. nothing.
I've never been so embarrassed. It's like waking up as Fred Durst.
Whats proper etiquette for apologizing to your wife for being so drunk you stood up and pissed on the bedroom floor next to the bed?
I woke up at 4 am to a guy curled up in the fetal position sobbing in our front yard. Oh college.
He's so vague sometimes. Like dude, we've been friends for 3 years. I don't need you to be vague, I need you to be inside of my vagina.
I dunno, there's just something so\ncomforting about having his penis in my mouth.
I definitely don't have enough experience with hookers to be in this group text anymore.
Per my usual Thursday, I blacked out and slept on the stairs.
He says the sweetest things but also that he wants to choke me when we fuck so it's kinda perfect.
Randomize
