i may not always bang 16 year olds but when i do, i prefer hot ones
he's making romantic advances towards me. and he has a pet snake. 2nd part not relevant, but interesting.
So this shipmate of mine somehow managed to throw up in his back pocket.
The required reading for this week is a paper about birds called great tits. Let's see my TA keep a straight face through this discussion.
I think i found piece of your tooth in my dick this morning when i took a shower
Just to clear things up. I did not walk in on him jacking off to your facebook profile.
i remember you telling me to take a shower, brush my teeth, go get back in bed w her, and "just do what i was born to do." and as soon as i stopped yacking i did just that. you saved my birthday.
I know you think I'm being paranoid, but can you please make sure Danny doesn't rub my wedding invitation on his balls?
I'm not trying to alarm you guys, but I think I just swallowed a ketchup packet.
Y'all best leave this "I can only have a couple drinks" shit at the door. U don't drive to Yukon to have a shot. I'm getting u fuckers drunk.
I'm smoking a bowl with matches and a candle while my mother washes dishes downstairs. I thought adulthood was supposed to be different.
KY in my mouth and throat does not a party make.
I just chased my hot mailman down the street to ask him out and now I am 98% positive he gave me a fake number.
Dude like i feel like i did ALL OF THE DRUGS yesterday
No. I'm home alone and 100% dickless. I hate my life.
Randomize
