If she sucks any more cock I swear she will be a spermivore
If I saw her on the street and didn't know about the two of them, I would think the only way she'd ever find love was if she somehow found her way to middle earth and an orc took her in
Stop staring at my boobs, I can't concentrate
Well how do you think I feel
fair enough
suddenly, hermaphrodite night sounds like a really bad idea
My dealer, who also happens to be a male stripper, just invited me to watch him perform tonight. Boundaries buddy, boundaries.
They were lying down in the parking garage pretending to be speed bumps...
There are about 5 pictures of my dog taking a dump on my camera and 20 of Brandon taking one for "comparison" reasons.
I didn't cheat on him. He just hasn't been informed of the open part of our relationship.
Me too it's so nice. Debated studying out there but woulda been 90% babe-watching 5% flexing 3% studying and 2% talkin my boners down.
I just made a drug deal 100% through snap chat
my night stand is a mini fridge, dont even try to get on my level of laziness.
I woke up in a bath tub and my face was sore and it wasn't because of you, I was impressed
I told him about the time I blacked out and shit myself and he still wanted to have sex with me that night. Feeling pretty optimistic about where this fling is going.
Grab some lube and condoms and you get a free shirt? College is weird
I told him to come over when I realized that I did have time for a quick booty call before church.
Randomize
