I Bought a bracelet with bible characters and a charm broke. the virgin mary one. Do you think it's a sign?
Is it really that bad? I heard it was like pooping. I like pooping.
Reach down the front of your pants and feel around for a while. When you find your balls, leave the library and meet me at the bar.
And then he said "I can't get blown while Gordon Bombay and Mr. Holland stare at me from the TV"
dude, when you're random girl from last night came down the stairs this morning she fell all the way down. I laughed. She just walked out. I hope shes ok. Tell her I give her a 10 for that landing though.
My dad is drinking wine out of a measuring cup. This explains so much.
She's doing shots in her underwear, a fur hat and mittens. I'm never coming home.
I'm cleaning my bathroom. That being said I found a klonopin and dropped it and stepped on it. Floor is clean im gonna snort it.
I had a dream that we erected a stage in our living room for "impromptu performances" how can we make this a reality?
sometimes when you're high at work you just have to say fuck it and eat the dog treats
Fingerblasting some girl on the deck tryna get her to fuck on a lifeboat
It took me three days, but I managed to nearly get arrested on my way out of LA. Made it to the airport. Crisis averted, though. The real crime is, my flight is delayed two hours.
I'd cum everywhere if I could have chicken nuggets right now
Don't forget to grab a pregnancy test and sloppy joe mix for tonight
I tried to breakup with him by telling I had a threesome. He one upped me by saying he had a 5-some so I couldn’t do it.
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