is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
I can't get into him, he looks really young. I'd feel like I was blowing the Gerber baby.
He just made me a heart out of cocaine... i think i'm in love
Well, think of it this way, if this were 200 years ago your father would have received the most goats in all the village for your fertile loins. Think about that.
I added "don't hook up with boys with girlfriends" to my new years resolution and realized how sad it was that it made me actually feel like a better person
I need a picture of your dick for my friends birthday card
i now officially have to be stoned in order to look like my passport when i go to a different country
I stuck a note to his door with my gum explaining why i couldn't spend the night. as i was walking away, he opened the door...i fell down and played dead. deffinitly didn't see me.
Please assure him that the flying penis statue is for display purposes only.
we left when one of the guys tried to stick himself with an IV that he found
If I die tonight, I want you to have the rest of my nachos. And my porn collection.
She's trying to change her flight... IM BEING COCKBLOCKED BY DELTA CUSTOMER SERVICE
Woke up with a girls naked next to me I had her thong on somehow.
I just had a morning three-some with marijuana and a detachable shower-head
He just fucked me into paralysis. can't feel my hands or face.
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