brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
It feels like I shit a light bulb that shattered on the way out.
this crazy girl in up in Dennys is going crazy because Bob Saget just texted her.
while being fingered today, I was told I have an abnormally deep g-spot. Now you know, I am a size queen because of SCIENCE.
Resolution for 2011: blow jobs are a privilege, not a right.
Judging by the crutches in the living room I take it you two are fine and we aren't going out tonight?
I'm just planning on experiencing Disney as adult style as it gets. Drinking bloody mary's at dawn and telling all the kids waiting in lines how badly their future sucks and that Santa isn't real.
The fact that she put a frat guy in check tells me I did some good raising my little sister. Time to see if she does keg stands.
Make the kitchen floor stop waving. Im trying to lay on it
right now I need to figure out a smart way to get an accurate picture of his dick so I know what in dealing with, right now in flying blind.
You were so stoked after landing that flip that you dropped acid with three random guys without hesitation
She doesn't believe I only want to use you for sex. She has a much higher opinion of me than either of us do.
I was really hoping my 420 would involve a lot more weed and a lot less buttholes
Your phone just changed "liver" to "liquor" how dose that make you feel
I was too lazy to get my chapstick out of my purse so i lubed up my lips with pizza grease. On a scale of 1-10 how embarassed should i be?
Randomize
