We argued about the championship during sex. Absolutely the manliest moment of my life.
Tried to eat a sandwich this morning. Couldn't. My jaw is locked up. These marathon blow jobs are killing me
He'll choke me during sex but he won't eat a strip of bacon. Vegetarians are weird.
Just found my old bop it. So many drinking game possibilities
having sex with him is like cage fighting mixed with pilates...the condoms didn't stand a chance...
Well were gunna have to wash the couch cover now...maybe even the couch, soap or fire your decision
and that my friend is why you dont go in for an eye exam and drop 250 dollars on a pair of glasses after smoking a blunt
My bank account got hacked so he showed up with a 6 pack wearing a superman cape to cheer me up and you question why I love him?
You let someone poor beer into my mouth off of a balcony. Best friend test failed.
Haahahahahahhaaa
he high fived his dick after we had sex
ok morning sex is a totally valid reason to come in late... ur good, cya in 20
How'd things go with that guy last night?
He threw up in the consol in my car then started crying about his ex girlfriend.
fuck st louis. fuck their hockey. fuck their basball. fuck their football if they still got it. fuck their tiddlywinks teamm. fuck their ribs. fuck their entire city. what im trying to say is i dont like st louis
No I'm not lying to you. I'm just not telling you the whole story. There's a massive difference.
21st birthday weekend in Vegas has concluded and all I'm missing is my underwear and 'Contacts' icon on my phone home screen.
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