I'll pay for our taxi if you let me makeout with the drummer and we don't leave RIGHT when the bassist does.
I have a story that starts with Nutella and ends with sex in the laundry building at RIT.
she said if she won the lottery she'd fuck me... isn't that like government funded prostitution?
I feel like she's the kind of girl who always ends up with guys who have oddly shaped dicks..
I had a party to get rid of booze. Woke up with even more. Will do this till I can open a liquor store
This went bad. Everyone is crying, i dont know why and I am really uncomfortable.
Next time we throw a party together I would appreciate it if you didn't try to get my friends to hook up with friends of yours you know have herpes
Don't worry. This time I'll get black out drunk so they'll just think it's an American thing.
I am now best friends with a lesbian named Zulu. I am pretty hammered already and made a game time decision to stay here another night,for partying purposes
Just so you know, if you are not feeling well today it's cause you drank a gatorade bottle full of highlighter fluid.
I threw away my jacket instead of washing it, the jungle juice stained me more of shame than red food coloring... i have never been that white girl wasted before...
Just saw an all male dolphin threesome from underwater viewing
its 2pm. u awake yet?
ill text u back later. still peeling fingernail polish off my face.
Not sure who they are or where we're going but they just bought me 3 tacos so I'm staying.
Nothing like an afternoon walk of shame across campus on parent's weekend. Damn.
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