You're completely useless in the revolution.
i puked in the mini-firdge
we don't have a mini-fridge?
bought one. it ws too cheap to pass up. xcept now there's puke in it,,, but the freezer's fine so i feel pretty good about that
do you know why "how to shave your balls" is bookmarked on my computer?
I bought a bottle of 100 proof for the storm. I am going to drink until I pass out. I'm taking bets. 1:30 pm is the over/under.
I have just two goals for this NYE. 1) get so drunk that every guy looks like Clive Owen 2) make out with as many Clive's as possible.
My bruised ribs were so worth that win in beer pong
I joked that if anyone could fuck a 35 year old woman while wearing head bands and arm sweat bands it's you and look what happens.
she comes in perfect pitch. hook up with more singers.
I puked up my nose. THAT kind of night
I'm surprised I didn't lose anything last night. Except maybe my dignity but other than that we gucci.
I think when Jesus turned water into wine it was a sign that we should get drunk off Sangria tonight. Do it for Jesus. He died for your sins.
If you get any calls give me a heads up. Im drinking rum in my underwear on the back porch.
Well statistically J has a 1 in 3 chance of hospitalization when downtown
And a 3 for 3 for disapeearing
I think getting right with the Lord should involve more than me and a bottle of tequila.
I look like a hot mess, emphasis on the hot now, more emphasis on the mess later
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