My grandmass entire neighborhood is over for dessert and i'm high as fuck...about to make a couple of freshman boys real uncomfortable
Freshman in high school? Just your type
why is every porn film shot in the same house? with the same red couch!?!
How can she be afraid to give you a blowjob? It's not like your penis is going to turn on her and eat her.
just watched an entire episode so you think you can dance for head. so wasn't worth it
nothing like a tattoo of a large eagle attacking a small eagle whos attacking a shark to bond to siblings together for life
Go to petsmart and tell me if the dog trainer is the guy I slept with friday. Thanks.
He has a landing strip. I repeat he has shaven himself a landing strip. HELPPPP!
He managed to scream "cowabunga bitch" before he went down on me. Let me know if you still like him.
Maybe shotgunning 4 days after oral surgery wasn't such a good idea after all...
I am both excited and frightened by the fact that this much everclear is legal here. Best vacation ever.
Note to self: Never spend $8 on a liter of rum again
I feel kind of like we’re in a gang and tonight is one of those “people are gonna know not to fuck with us” type of nights. And then tomorrow I am going to learn to pole dance. I’m not really sure how I got to this point in my life… but I like it.
And then I was like pick your blow job song and he choose the sonic the hedgehog theme song. If he's not the one no one is.
He started humming a moment like this when I was taking off his pants.
My ex gave me head because she said she didn't enough when we were dating... Best ex ever? I think yes.
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