we went to that german restaurant and drank out of the boots. Then I threw up into one
i'm all for saving the environment, but when we get into the shower to fuck, he shouldn't flip his shower hourglass timer
running late. just ran over a dude on a bike
There was a community pot of Ramen, and if you were in the pool you were either fully clothes or ass naked.
Um....sorry for hooking up with your brother last night...
Actually i take that back. You dropped the whiskey last night and broke the bottle. Were even
Skip school. Seven hour blow job Plus Disney movies. Day of champions
he also bled all over my floor. unrelated to cats but true nonetheless.
I'm bored enough im considering taking up his offer to turn me straight just to kill time until the lasagna is out of the oven
You're like Jane Goodall in a forest of gay men. Someday your autobiography will be called "Bottoms in the Mist".
You rubbed a frozen pizza in my face. The concerning part was that it was semi cooked from our body heat
now that we broke up we are playing hot potato with the cock ring.. Poor thing just needs a home
It's just not St. Patrick's Day until someone pukes on your panties.
Here's a concept though: eating pasta while getting laid
There is a french fry attached to my steering wheel and a note that says "eat me yum yum" can you explain this?
Does sending her to the conference instead of a competent employee and putting her in a suite make up for banging her husband behind her back?
No, but she’ll have a nice memory when she gets dumped and fired on the same day.
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