why did u let me go home with him last night?
u were determined it was a good idea
I'm torn. Shes everything I ever wanted, but I just cant get past the story about having drunken sex with her dog in high school.
There is still throw up in my sink from before break. God I missed this place
I'm currently using two paint brushes as chopsticks to eat lasagna.... college.
8$ liquor pitchers. I'm gonna wear two or three pairs of underwear so when drunk me takes them off there'll still be a pair on.
She spent a lot of time to get her cleavage to look that good. It would be rude not to stare. It shows you are paying attention. Chicks dig that.
I have been way too involved with your nipples this weekend
i just sent him like 8 different sexts and he texted me back about how good the hummus is that i left in his fridge.
My vagina is not really on board with my "emotional issues"
I walked outside an you were laying down talking to a star about your life. That's when I took the bottle of jack away...
She looked up at the menu and yelled this is my absolute favorite literacy
Like please, take your microdick and try to stick it someplace else. It is not welcome in my world.
Face washed and sleeping pill taken. Here's hoping for a more sex filled tomorrow.
It might look like I curled my hair last night but it's just the jiz.
He just chose domino's over sex. ARE YOU KIDDING ME?
Randomize
