What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
I had a fork in my beer hand and just stabbed my tongue.
try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
Brogan sounds similar to Bridget...sorta.
Every girl's name is automatically translated to "Baby/Milk Carrier" in my brai
My mouth already tastes like senor cuervo took a piss in it and it's barely 1 am
Pre-drinking/conditioning my liver for this impending hurricane party associated with cat. 2 hurricane Irene. Be ready to roll in a weather channel minute.
what the fuck is a social media consultant, who does she consult for, and how bad is she at it? her facebook account is currently hacked and posting ads for the ipad 2 on my newsfeed
nothing like walking in the house at 3 am in my panties and a sheer shirt carrying a life sized cardboard dale earnhardt jr
I just threw up all of my lunch in the Barnes & Nobles parking lot. Rockbottom tastes like a veggie burger, in case you were wondering.
where did we go last night? there's dollar bills all over my room & they're all wet.
If I'm going to keep blacking out this much I need to start taking more pictures.
I'm feeding a baby and swiping on tinder...what has my life come to?!?!
First day of school is awesome. I get to meet my students and figure out which of their mothers I’ I’m going to bang
I am way to hungover for it to be Thursday.
Randomize
