This girl is very crazy
She's one of those compassionate ppl
So everything I said on this seemingly endless date offended her
trying to fathom saturday night and the fact that Rainn Wilson now hates me. my brain hurts.
No, drunk sperm still make babies.
I am in the checkout line at the dollar store and there is a guy in front of me holding a pregnancy test, a chocolate bar, and fake roses. Champion.
Shaking her cervix like it's the hottest ticket around
Thanks to this cookie, I have now eaten something other than skittles today.
Its been 4 years since I have masturbated this hard. God bless the Olympics!
We've given up. My vagina is tired of constant lonely nights and disappointments. This is our retirement.
My mom is currently drinking alone in our kitchen singing the Dixie Chicks to herself so, hey, alcohol is forever and we should not be shamed for its use.
They put me in room 420 every time and I take bubble baths and smoke in the room and they bring food TO MY BED
Oh. So it is a cult
Basically. But a nice cult. They eat muffins and talk about fundraising.
I mean seriously with your cock and my tits combined we could rule the world. Pinky and the brain style
So... Sex in my rain boots last night. Trashy or a great show of character?
If it was with a guy, trashy. Sex with a girl is never trashy.
It was great. We stayed up all night talking about objects he'd put in his theoretical vagina.
My breath smells like gin and sadness
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