drink some water, pull the trigger, get a bfast sandwich. Only good things.
look mate, i'm pretty sure 14 texts saying "fuck me. fuck me now" more than passes the legal benchmark for consent.
I fell asleep to the sounds of them banging in the next room. It was oddly soothing...
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
In case you were unaware playing with rabbits on ecstasy is the greatest thing ever. I feel like I'm ODing on adorable right now.
Did I tell you I had a charge show up for $36 on a credit card I haven't used in 6 months from Wild Wings? It was that night we slept across the street from the bar.
can you come back were all locked out and alyssia's still inside passed out on the floor but more importantly i left a beer in there that's not finished
I five year old is judging me because I just opened a bottle of Sam Adams with my teeth before 8am
Well apparently I'm no fun since I won't have a threesome with him and my mother.
Don't ask me how, but I have a squirrel in my backpack and I don't know what to do with it.
tell me there's a reason my bed smells like paint thinner
he kept telling me how much his girlfriend would love me while we were making. why does tequila always do this to me?
All I know is when I checked my phone this morning google translate was open with "help the cow ate my robot" translated to French
im drinking out of a pineapple, so yea.
OMG. When you threw the used condom on your floor you threw it in my purse!!! I just went to grab my headphones and it was stuck to them!
Randomize