I just woke up in bed next to my teacher. Does that mean I'm passing now?
Well you know what I always say about freshmen.... If you want it, and they've got it... get it.
you're dressed like that and you're on the rag, that's false advertisment
does it still count as break up sex if it's 4 months later? sorry i'm just looking for an excuse to fuck him.
4pm on a Sunday....roomate fucking like a wildabeast while I have a organic chemistry study group in my kitchen.
i'm gonna fuck his crew, i'm gonna wax my asshole. i'm gonna make them all cry tears of sex joy then move to colorado.
How was the birthday sex?
Shit got outta hand. Honestly I think even my STDs have STDs.
Get you some cowboy.
In that sentence you are the cowboy. That is not saying you should get a cowboy for yourself.
And now we should drink to that moment where you realize you didn't exactly think things through.
"I'm gonna wax that ass" was the successful pick up line used on me last night. Clearly I had a few too many cause it worked..
i seriously haven't spoken to him since i drunk dialed him and told him i loved his beard
I have a bad feeling I'm going to like this fuck buddy
I finished masturbating now I'm eating french toast crunch. What is life, and what are friends.
I'm not winning any crowns in the Miss Emotionally Stable pageant either...
No. I don't like you. I like your penis. Chin up. At least I like part of you.
Randomize
