Tell him ill love him long time
I'll assure him of it
I've decided to film a documentary centered around how he manages to keep that beast caged in such tight pants
Is it just me or do I always seem to have cum in my bellybutton?
today is the best snowday of my entire life. also its no shirt day.
They don't exactly give out small business loans to start-up dealers
Her bed looked like it had just hosted a water balloon fight. It was that good.
Well she got high, deleted the essay she was working on, and then ordered dominos. We all manage stress in different ways.
Post breakup Disney World may be my best idea ever! Tinkerbell just grabbed my dick and gave me a kiss! This really is the happiest place on earth!
You was so high that you insisted that you heard someone whistle, then you insisted they was trapped in the wall!
Literally told everyone you're my idol cause you ate a chicken nugget off a sword
this is a PSA to never have sex in a bed from ikea
Is it okay to get drunk at a baby shower? ....asking for a friend
I just caught my bangs on fire trying to lite a bowl while driving. Thank god it wasn't my eyebrows like last time.
they are cutting me off...little do they know I am making a 75 yr old man i named Herbert buy me drinks now...no shame at 11 am...
A true gentleman never tells. But yes, I did indeed get laid last night
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