I'm so glad you managed to take a picture of your foreskin before you broke my camera.
and she's shaped like a lego person so that's not happening
I just woke up with streamers wrapped around me. Glitter in my hair. My fish are swimming in empty bottles of Barcardi. Helpppp
He felt like a one man threesome
The cereal milk was almost black, the bacon was still frozen and the toast was soggy. And that was BEFORE I puked in her lap.
i love you. like a brother. a brother that i had sex with more than once.
Her virginity is one of the last things that remains of our childhood.
Also one of my neighbors is blasting "pumped up kicks" and possibly butchering some chickens
I'm toasting stale bread and thinking of you
Is that a sex thing?
Mid stroke she told me she'd had bigger. Replied I could tell. Sex ended right at that moment.
I want to but I can't have a boner while doing a install and working with a customer
Well... I got her number now... I think she is a dish best served drunk
"Fwd: Nice to meet you last night thanks for the tit flash" no recollec. i am officially banned from wearing tube tops to the bar.
You are hungover. Your arguments are irrational an incoherent. We only played twice. Have some Gatorade and take a knee.
Of course my parents remember you. You showed them your tits
Randomize
