Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
she reminds me of the kind of girl who'd fuck in church if you asked. I can dig it.
It sucks..Now I'm depressed because appearence wise, she's the closest to my favorite pornstar I'll ever get..
Remind me tomorrow to take that ball-gag out of my purse.
I fell asleep with all the lights and heat on in the apartment with windows open, Earth Hour is lost on people like me.
I'm going to go out on a limb and say last night was a success, also the neighbors are counting down the days until we move out.
He put himself in the friend zone by calling me dude all night so I blew his friend. Judge me.
I never thought I would be having sex behind a shower curtain that wasn't in a bathroom.
Do not shit in our house. There is no TP. I am walking to get more, if I do not return, I have probably died of dysentery after my last wagon wheel got stuck in a gulch. Tell Martha and Lou Ann that I love them, and that I passed away doing the Lord's work.
And then my hands went numb and no one believed me so I started putting peoples cigarettes out on them. Shitty idea i'll tell you that much
I fell asleep completely naked, standing up with my arms and head in the freezer
Also I'd apologize for texting you flipping my shit about the science of hair growth while I was shrooming last night but we know each other better than that
Do you think it would be okay if i cleaned my cartilage piercing with the leftover vodka?
So now your dad has seen my tits. You could have told me he was coming by to help paint.
I didn't think you'd be painting the kitchen topless.
I couldn't find a shirt I was willing to ruin.
It's been so long since I had sex I might propose to the next girl who will sleep with me.
Randomize