And then he asked me why the subtitles were in Arabic. The television was off.
i don't think my life will be extraordinarily more meaningful if i let him put his tongue in my butthole.
Just whatever you do please don't lick his face again.
I dont know if this is a good time to tell you but im actually a freshman.. not a senior
Just made a list of all the guys I've hooked up with. "Roofie tattoo eyelids", "xanex night guy", "rainy concert", "cory blanket" and "naked hottub guy" made it.
Found a popcorn kernel in my pubes... Time fir a Brazilian
So many gingers... It's like a beacon went out that said "this one is ok with red hair"
It's cuz all she eats is salt lick, human souls, and fast food
The fact I have to evaluate my choice between tequila and fruity pebbles is a clear image of my life right now
They were out of soap so you started calling yourself a dirty bitch
How does one acquire holy water?
Just sitting at dinner with my dad...simultaneously texting "daddy" to confirm saturday's spanking and telling another guy to get condoms before Im done with dinner. Don't know when I got so ate up but I'm loving it. You?
Regretting asking you what you were doing.
I wish there was a tumbleweed emoji. Because that would describe my vagina.
They made Game of Thrones Oreos. Kill me.
Your shit was massive.
I'm not 100% sure how to respond to that.
If you were in a "who has the massivest shit contest", you'd win by a landslide.
Randomize
