I just hatefucked a Bush administration appointee. Now having celebratory mimosas.
i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
I just accidently deleted 60 gigs of porn from my external hard drive. Thats over 300 pornos! I think im gonna cry.
Im surprised that you are even able to text me right now.
I'm afraid my bank account can't handle syllabus week.
I think my vagina is going to steal my keys and drive over there.
Hopefully she would park on my face.
Ok I am NOT pregnant. I could shove coal up my vagina and my uterus would turn it into a diamond in a matter of minutes
I just realized that in 3 weeks it becomes sad if I make everything into a drinking game. Fuck growing up
What part of a retired stonemason dealing with your rock hard cock does not sound like you have the wrong number ?
I stole all of the toasting champagne and did an interpretive dance to "wind beneath my wings". I am literally everything you're not supposed to do at weddings.
But your showmanship is impeccable.
So I have been told that I licked your eyebrows last night
STOP PUTTING PICTURES OF JONAH HILL IN MY KITCHEN CABINETS!
Like you can't just be like oh bb and THEN SEND ME A FUCKING PICTURE OF MY 8TH GRADE FAT SELF IN A TACO COSTUME
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
The guy i took home was a circus freak. He jerked off 3 times in front me after we had sex. And he came every time.
Randomize
