I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
you threw up in the bushes next to the ABC store and kept saying "you're home, blueberry vodka, you're home!"
I'd call her a cunt, but she dooesn't seem to have the depth or warmth.
Just heard the new 'We are the world' ... Can I get my 10 bucks for Haiti back?
you were crying while pretty ricky was playing, what did you want me to do
From the trajectory of the puke, I must have fallen off the top bunk while trying to vomit, due to the dented bucket, ruined carpet, and bruised dignity I now own.
I woke up this morning next to a stack of saltines & a txt from u saying "do it." it took me a second to remember wat was going on
high enough to want to lick peanut butter off of Michael Buble's vocal chords as he serenades me.
Yeah... I was considering changing that part but the boxed wine is non-negotiable.
Please put me in a whole with no windows and never let me out.
He was president of his frat and had a clap on disco ball in his room... or course I slept with him
No, that was the night I helicoptered my dick to oncoming traffic. Im talking about the night I ran naked down the street.
If you quit, you're not going to stick to our game plan of dead by 40. I will not be in the titty bar nursing home without you damning
Damnit.
Oh no. Did we do a blood oath again?!
So um... You probably shouldn't post that picture of me and your crotch just because that's a new level of raunchiness that I'm not willing to accept yet
Randomize
