The answer to your question is yes. I am wearing a star of david to the bar in order attract a jewish man.
Bouncy castle Catalina wine-mixer race for the cure. It will be as fun as it sounds
Things I can say. There is a photo of me pouring whipped cream into a midgets mouth.
He pulled his pants down and said blow me, while passing out on my bed. I then pulled his pants up as he continuously started moaning in the background.
Fuck a-yeah! I just found a wine key. Let 'Don't Fuck With Me Friday' commence.
I'm basically flying you out for a long weekend of sex and going to the zoo
I'm cool with that
He told me he felt like he was just pistol-whipped by Testicle Man.
I couldn't find pants for like 20 minutes so I was butt ass naked just sitting on your floor
I can still taste the Jäger. I'm gonna shoot myself.
I just found out my younger brother has me saved in his contacts as "Womb Primer" and I don't know what to do with this information
I'm not sure why he thinks weird that I masturbate AND look at pinterest at the same time.
Why would you get kicked out?
Well, an overweight man is currently not wearing a shirt. Or pants. And is getting in touch with his inner Chippendale. You can probably fill in the blanks.
I'm her ex, so unless you're interested in her massive moral failings and open season vagina, I'm not your guy.
havent showered in 2 days. just Febrezed my balls in the car before going into a movie alone with a 40 of Guinness.there isn't a word in English for how single I am.
sometimes u just gotta ride a dildo and forget about life
Randomize