There's a girl in front of me with a see through white shirt on and her back says I suck bad dick. Fun night hun?
Worst part of St. Paddy's...me drunkenly crying to a U2 cover band.
I haven't been "cry when you eat ben and jerrys" high in a while.
her cat was choking so she kept trying to stick her finger in her cat's mouth while saying "it's okay kitty, just do what mommy does"
We did lines off of a Whitney Houston CD case. That makes everything okay.
I wanna thank you for having such slutty friends growing up. Your a great little sister
Desperately trying not to throw up over the side of the ferry back to CT. Can't be the first one of the season.
On a lighter note, my mom and I were playing scattergories, and for "things that you keep hidden" we both put dildo. Proof that we really are related.
She kept talking about how amazing the banana she had yesterday was. Don't know if it was innuendo, stoned, or just a really amazing banana.
Drinking, I should not. Got here I don't know. Still drunk, I am. At courtneys.
Lol i have proven this trip that I can meet a chick and fuck her within 72 hours no matter where she lives
Do you have any need for a scary clown mask?
I also just stashed a half dozen bobby pins in my bra.... So when you take it off later, consider yourself warned
Is it weird to invite your FWB to thanksgiving dinner??
Its just akward. Everytime he tells me he loves me, I have to respond with, I love having sex with you. and he just stares at me in amazement
Randomize
