i think my tv is drunk
Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
i've decided to use this saturday afternoon to take care of my pube situation
Your drunken mistake is coming over to see if she wants to buy any of our furniture. I know youre desperate, but try not to fuck her, without a condom, for a fourth time, while shes there.
Been considering the feasibility of adopting a kangaroo. Yes I'm very serious. And yes I'm very high.
So which one of you fuckers changed my backgrounds while I was passed out to me holding a chicken like the statue of liberty?
I'm just saying; the box truck will cost less then dorms or rent, and we can always crash where the party is.
Fucked a kid by the name of your hometown tonight... FOR THE WIN.. BF4L
Jungle juice turns everything into a pickup line. All I said was "do you play chess" and somehow I got laid.
She tried to subtly measure me, but I noticed. She told me I barely made the cut otherwise there would have been just a handshake as a parting gift.
If he cant deal with my insomnia and sex drive I really feel sorry for his child and ex fiance. Adulthood breakups are depressing.
Put a Santa hat on my junk. He's wants to be festive too.
I just need to find someone whose kink is financial submission.
Nice girl until she takes off the fake human suit and shows you the flesh eating demon she truly is
This pandemic, it’s making everyone horny. I’ve got dick stashed all over town
Randomize
