note to self: Never ask your girlfriend to have a 3some with your ex...
After going down on me he either said "there, it's over" or "there's an odor"... I couldn't hear him and was too embarrassed to ask him to repeat himself. I just got dressed, grabbed my bag, and left. So I don't think there's gunna be a second date. =(
what i wouldnt give for a night at orourkes without seeing 3+people ive slept with
He said I came instead of I'm coming. I wonder if he noticed my state of confusion when I stopped blowing him.
Wasn't he an English major?
I am way too high for this. Some guy just keeps talking about music and life goals and he apparently has lived in every city we mention we are going
He kept telling me how extraordinarily clean my ears were.
Dad and I are shitfaced screaming at Canadians in Walmart. Life is good.
I faked more orgasms with him then ever should be allowed for someone this pretty.
I'm just blindly tossing my dick into whatever comes my way.
For some reason she gave me a handjob. It was all very confusing
Nothing says "Happy New Year" like having to shit into a plastic bag.
So I'm at home coloring while smoking a joint. It can only go down hill from here.
I am literally watching TV with sunglasses on because the brightness hurts my hangover
You're lucky I just like fucking you because you would really suck at being a boyfriend.
Nothing kills the mood like opening another guy’s dick pic in bed
Randomize
