Just found a dugout in my rental car glove box. Suddenly my mood is upbeat.
My male hookup buddy is gonna meet my female hookup buddy, let the awkward hookup games begin!
I had sex with her like 200 times, and she was only pregnant once, those are pretty good statistics.
Currently doing my walk of shame down a floating dock. No more guys who live on a boat EVER AGAIN
Well I could just do a roadtrip and hit them all. Slut tour 2012.
He will. He has no choice. What's he gonna do? Find a better fuck buddy? We both know that's not possible. I'm the ideal friend with benefit. Minus snoring and uneven tits.
He went THROUGH MY PHONE (he's 30 for God sake) then asked me why I was stringing along 12 guys... I told him he could have just asked me if I was banging other people and then saved himself from looking at pics of dicks bigger than his.
Pounding your chest saying "me Tarzan" is not flirting or even talking
the new numbers in my phone would beg to differ
If I'm going to risk life and limb to wear a Wings jersey to the Garden next week, the least they can do is win.
And the most would be ending up in bed with one of them.
His penis looked like how I would imagine Satan's pinky finger.
Shaving your bikini line at 11 at night in the Walmart bathroom feels trashy no matter why you're doing it.
Steve watched craig and I have sex from the top level of his cat tower this morning.
Be happy for me... Or horny... Or be a really good friend and feel what I want you to feel. Jealousy
Fast is cars. Home is I now. Drunk yoda me is.
i mean ive seen your left buttcheek how much more bro can this get
Randomize
