As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
your brother just told me that Guinness is the first book of the Bible...
Is it bad that I voted for Scott Brown because I want to fuck him?
Nah. I did too.
part of it is the fact that im problem drinking, and the other part is my OCD wont let me leave the bottle half-empty.
I woke up on the stairs at of a Disneyland hotel. Yes, my night was amazing.
My mom assumed I was crying because he was leaving. Figured that was better than explaining my eye's sensitivity to semen..
no i had to finish in the bathroom to a pic of her mom in a bikini.
My contribution to the dinner party was a bottle of vodka and a bag of uncooked potatoes. I felt like a Russian serf.
You aren't truly friends with someone until you play drinking games via text at 8:30 in the morning.
I sense naked hashbrown eating in my near future.
Hey, YOU try working out drunk every night! Besides, I think at least one of those bruises is a hickey.
Who the fuck hid 3 Zimas under my pillow?! Icing doesn't count when it's 8am the next morning and everyone's left and you've passed out on your couch. Currently chugging 2 of 3...
Oh. My. God. I. Am. Going. To. Punch. Someone. In. The. Face. Immediately.
you told us the chicken was mocking you, then proceeded to explain that every time someone reads your mind you accidentally think of something sexual
I am real keen for none of this to be taken out of context so let’s just shut it down right now
Randomize
