I mean i might have to drop this class tomorrow. I just walked into a midterm
I just found $40 in the jeans I wore last night. PS I also found the jeans I wore last night.
Dude, we're at Einstein's Bagels and the dude next to us is spreading cannabutter on his bagel.
We are so drunk I just let him piss between my legs on the toilet. That's love.
Dave a horae rider a coqw boy
She said she wanted to have closure sex.
The good news is I managed to avoid the three cop car looking for me. The bad news is I no longer have shoes.
Only sluts go out in this weather carpe diem boys
These bubbles make my penis feel like it is resting on clouds.
I wish buying curtains was as easy as buying drugs. I already KNOW what I want and what the outcome will be: awesome.
are you putting in a lot of effort today like appearance wise
I am taking my rightful place as emperor of the undead appearance wise
I feel like I just did it with Buster from Arrested Development. Taking a shower. #winefail
I told her I was going to sleep early last night. I probably should not have sent that snapchat of us playing beer pong.
A legendary roster of degenerates has been assembled.
I'm soaking her vibrators in tabasco and wasabi paste. "furious" is an understatement
Randomize
