Stop everything. They have oreo straws to drink milk with and then you eat the straw. I think i just got turned on by a cookie commercial.
you went to subway and got pissed when they refused to deep fry your sub
Maybe he just has a boisterous penis
Just got arrested at PF changs. Happy New year, China
I want to fuck you with a popsicle till it melts then eat it out of you
Really.
His bootycalls folder in his contacts are divided into regions, we should have all become airline pilots.
And I'm ok with his balls touching my ass
Last night in my drunkenness I bought hurricane supplies which included a jug of wine and a bouquet of flowers. Apparently I'm going to woo Irene.
I have effectively turned laundry day into a drinking game.
I was just hotboxing under my sheets and I got lost on the way out.
It was so scary.
The language barrier was annoying .... So we just had sex. That is how you deal with not being able to chat isn't it???
The only thing he told me before he passed out was that he is from Buffalo and I'm a bitch.
you would not believe who i just fucked on my lunch break
I'm gonna write a book entitled "when you give a cop a cookie..."
I don't even want to know.
My last one night stand called me today. Apparently I gave him a yeast infection in his mouth. Not sure how I should feel about this.
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