I don't know, I don't really wanna ask the question, "Mom why am I not circumcised?"
just asked if they'd gift wrap go-go taquitos for you at 7-eleven
In the middle of having sex, she said "if we continue, we're dating." I then pulled out and sat in the corner, naked. I deserve a Medal of Honor.
i sound like a 75 year old homeless man that has spent all his panhandling money on cigarettes since he was 12. that rough.
woke up to find i out made out with his roommate before hooking up with him. breakfast was awkward to say the least
he sent me the greatest dick pic I've ever received.
he actually took the time to cut a fingertip off of a glove then put it on his dick like a beanie. he called it hipster dick.
But I mean how many guys can say they get blow jobs and grilled cheese with football
Her hotness level dropped from an 8 to a 2 as soon as I walked into her place. It REEKED of cat piss and there was no litter box and NO CATS.
I mean seriously with your cock and my tits combined we could rule the world. Pinky and the brain style
theres a canoe in our lawn. we dont own a canoe.
it was the only safe place
Caitlin, you were laying in your bed feeding your dog ritz chips and singing a whole new world at 4am loud enough your neighbors came over an asked you to stop.
I love my life
I just chased my birth control with Smirnoff. Shit's about to go down.
Give me one good reason why I should go with you.
Free beer.
..pick me up at 8.
Listen this is important.. if I die tonight you have to be the drug dealer at my funeral
You’ll (maybe) appreciate that I picked at my ingrown hair again. Quarantine updates are getting BLEAK.
Randomize
