Will you still be my friend if I read and enjoyed Twilight?
No
who let me buy 6 packs of big league chew? and eat them all? thats not cool
I woke up on my floor...
I woke up with colors of the wind playing on repeat on my laptop...
i dont have any money that hasnt already been designated for cigarettes and birth control
Nothing says "You're all grown up now" like setting up your 401k with shitty underwear.
they're mlb prospects.. of course i'm gonna bang one of them.
there is a strobe light in my taxi. in what way is this safe.
I need moral support for this bender
We drunkenly built a couch fort and fucked in it. I've known her since preschool. This was every childhood fantasy mixed with adult dreams come true.
Appreciate the offer but I'm a huge fan of penis
Never go drinking with anime club. End of story.
No feeling is better than coming home from your booty call and putting on a fresh pair of granny panties
Today is get drunk without showing anyone my penis day
Whose house did we sneak into and play beer pong for 4 hours at last night?
I honestly have no idea
So I figured it out. There's two types of shitters. Moaners and grunters. And on occasion there's a third. It's the ill fabled grunt moaner.
Randomize
