Learned a lot. Like boys with frosted tips still exist. And that they're sensitive to constructive criticism.
No, I'm only going to drink half my paycheck. That's the responsible thing to do.
jungle juice + heels + stairs = broken arm
Do you think I can haggle my way to discounted weed on 4.21?
Ok. Cause im very serious about this. I wanna strip and do coke for a month
she's telling me all about the love triangles of her sims. you tell me how it's going.
I wouldn't accept the money so he folded the $20 bill into an origami puppy and left a note saying "Not blowjob money"
I am not saying a eulogy for your vibrator.
He kept trying to order 'sex on the tennis courts' for a drink last night
Oh and in case you were wondering it is not a good idea to eat weed brownies and then go out to the bar. When I got off the bar stool my high had just hit me and I felt like Bambi taking his first steps
Post walk of shame: realized the underwear I put on when I left was another girl's underwear.... woof
Children cease to be precious when they crap their shorts in the pool I exercise at.
In honor of today being Sunday I am day drinking and watching Grey's Anatomy all day. ALL DAY.
I'm sobbing to NWA
Thanks for fucking the skin off my dick
It was a joint effort between my vagina my feet and your hand you can't just blame that all on me
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