I'm afraid my bank account can't handle syllabus week.
Robbie told me you spent 10 mins discussing the curl in his hair and that you said "with that curl in your hair, you'll go far"
I feel like I've wasted too many painkillers on hangovers
It'd be a romantic, consensual abduction
He seems to have a lot of things figured out and most of the answers involve bourbon
You gave me balls I gave you half a boob. Fair trade
So neither of us had a dollar bill and we couldnt find a straw so we spent all nite doing coke through penne pasta
Ever since the Christmas fiasco of '08, I can no longer watch Rudolf the Red nosed reindeer without getting a hard on
Let me rub your butt and eat French fries from your mouth and dip them in your ketchup filled belly button.
dude, i just found out morgan freeman loves weed. all my moms arguments are now irrelevant
I agree with that homeless guy though, you do need a haircut
It's my birthday. I should be drinking mimosas in a top hat, not working.
the guy had "bad bitches only" tattooed above his penis...
I don't care how many things you caught on fire, it's still not as bad as doing coke and then filming yourself having sex.
i havent showered for 4 days and i just made my dog smell my arm pit. also, im stoned.
Randomize
