Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
you kept lifting my skirt up, yelling "PANTY PARTY". needless to say, you're at the top of my father's shit list right now.
can't wait for January to be Over so I don't have to see all the fat resolutionists working out.
Petty good. I just stapled a 5 dollar bill onto the chest of a sword swallower.
Charles Darwin would shit his pants if he saw that we managed to survive that weekend.
Bright side: maybe hell start being nice to you now that you know he has erectile dysfunction.
Just purchased ketchup, body wash, and lube. Hope you're ready for the post-memorial-day-cookout-shower-anal.
You woke up, laughed, proceeded to throw up on me and then passed out again.
I want to throw pennies on her stage, or just ripping up a dollor bill and throw them one at a time.
And at the semi-adult age of 25 I have shit my pants. Not even drunk, just really late to work. Is this real life?
It's hard picking what to wear when you know the plan is sex. Like can't I just wear my robe let's just simplify this.
I hope Trump leaves Planned Parenthood alone for at least another month. The week got away from me. #whorelando
I woke up in my basement holding someone else's underwear and a bottle of mouthwash . I wish I could explain more than that but i can't remember ...
Once my new license was put into my hand, a light from the heavens shined down and pauly D's voice was in my mind saying ohh yeaaah 21 yeaaah
But really, what kind of hoe life adventure in Mexico would you do that would top me blowing a trucker?
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