Do you think Patty Mayonase ever went down on Doug?
Kristen just told everyone at the bar that I've got a huge dick, now Brittany is giving me the eye. What is the opposite of FML?
i just picked a peanut m&m up off the floor. with my toes. and then proceeded to eat it.
Then he wanted a handjob in the car. While my cousin was driving. To krispy kreme. And there was someone else in the backseat.
Jesus...So southern.
I feel like I just need to fuck him after all his effort. like a "hey man good try" like those kids who get last place and still get a trophy.
There comes a time where you just have to sit back and watch the drunken idiots pee on each other
he just sent me a picture of his penis sticking through a piece of paper that he had drawn a stick figure with tits on it that said "you"
He ate shrooms at 9:30, said, "see you later," and left. I am alone on New Years.
She thinks I'm afraid I'm gonna get caught in one of my lies and some of the girls I'm fucking will find out about each other. But it would be a relief to offload a few from the old crop and work in a few newbies into the rotation. The organization could use some new blood.
I did a kegel this morning to determine if I had been penetrated during last night's blackout. Nope.
Grrr. Fine. You get oral for being unwrong.
can we drink soon
I'm not sure who this is but I'm free tomorrow night
we went book shopping, so yes this relationship is going to be about more than sex
Can't be considered a walk of shame if you pick up donuts on the way home
He makes me want to cheat on my other 3 boyfriends..
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