census says that i am hotter than the girl you just left with...sad for you
For the whole 7 seconds I lasted, I was in heaven.
whispering "taste the rainbow" well having sex isn't my biggest turn on.
Go for the frenulum. Its like eating a popsicle. They go nuts with that shit.
and then the other night his penis tricked us both into sex
naw. unless you want me to sit in a corner, not understand english and eat all of your cheese then i don't think it's a good idea.
We won 11 games of beer pong, and then I spent a half hour trying to get into the top bunk. Then i realized it was a cabinet in the bathroom
It was the night of "what the fuck have you done with my daughter and where is she" texts from mom...
I may have played more drinking games with my family this last week than all of freshman year...
Would it be inappropriate to do a science fair project on whether the type of drunk a person is is determined by nature or nurture
dude you're not even a fucking science major
no joke- she just sprinkled parmesan cheese into her champagne and slurred "I just need a little snack"
I have suspicion of morning wood.
How are you unsure as to the current state of your penis?
Dude I was tripping acid when she was crying and I literally couldn't defend myself
I think I'm actually too depressed to do drugs, wow.
Her hot older sister walked in on us, looked me up and down, then stared straight at her and said "I call sloppy seconds on this one" then left. I'm still debating on how I feel about that.
Randomize
