i just hugged the lady at the liquor store goodbye for the summer...
What makeup look will say to the therapist 'I am a smart, well-adjusted young woman'?
to whom it may concern. if i am dead in colleens bed it is not her fault i slept in my scarf. my dads middle name is ronald.
Do you think it's illegal to work at a bar if you're on probation for a DUI? I need a night job where I can meet men.
. Drop what your doing. Were going to Knoxville for midget wrestling. It's the championship.we can NOT miss this.
thanks for not telling him i named my trumpet after his dick
WHY did you say no to the sex seance?
hope your day is as exciting as mine- one of our trauma patients just stole an ambulance out of our bay... WITH AN EMT STILL IN IT.
I had sex on a dinosaur comforter, tell me that does not define my life.
I'm not sure what exactly you were planning, but you kept yelling that we were going to need a lot of midgets and a lawyer.
I washed my sheets. I did out of respect for my previous and current sexual partners.
FYI, his "son" is a Chihuahua.
I mean, I'm not upset that HE's getting married, I'm upset his penis has to go through with it by default
I wanted to make my beer stronger so I poured vodka in it. Why god....why
Just try and act like you're sober
I can't I snorted an anti depressant and he's pouring me tequila shots
Randomize
