I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
Something growled at me in your dark backyard last nt. Hoping it was my landwalking laser sharks and not Andy.
I just spread your mom's ashes with my new girlfriend. I wouldve waited for you to fly home but she was uncomfortable in the house with her remains there. I'll mail you the urn since u handpainted it.
YOU HAVE A GIRLFRIEND ALREADY!?! WTF WE JUST HAD HER FUNERAL 3 WEEKS AGO!!!!!!!!!!!!
I don't think he realizes it but he was stroking the faucet while he was talking to me.
i love that feeling when you wake up and have no idea how you got back to your dorm or why you have mac and cheese on your cheeks and eyelashes in your mouth
What are you wearing tonight?
The colors of the winddddddd
You know where a good place to spend summer is? In your head. High as shit. It doesn't matter where you are.
Ok. As long as I can keep Kevin contained to the room I'll be ok. If not u might have a naked puking Kevin at ur door
This band has the most fuckable violin player I have ever seen.
I DID NOT GO INTO HOURS OF STRENUOUS LABOR FOR YOU TO LOOK LIKE A DOMINATRIX BARMAID ON A WEEKDAY. AT LEAST SAVE IT FOR THE WEEKEND GDI.
Thirty seconds is a long time in jizz time...
You ask to touch his thighs ten times and called them magnificent.....need I say more
I ate her out and told her she tasted like pumpkin pie. She screamed that she hated pumpkins and started to cry
She got a boob job, dumped her husband, became a stripper, got a DUI in her Porsche and is now dating her lawyer
I’m making her my life coach if med school doesn’t work out
Randomize