PS - I'm in bed with an 18 yr old-am I a cougar?
No - puma.
He was crying to my sister about feeling like a bad person. Then he groped my breasts.
Lauren will drop me off I'll be drunk ride you for a little bit and then you can go to sleep
sorry. that wasn't for you
I just realized his fb pic was taken in a public bathroom.
Homegirl just dropped a candle on the floor major party foul. Thought it make you feel better.
the boat had a sign not to jump off the roof of it, which gave us the idea to jump off the roof of it
He is so amazingly handsome. I just wanna fuck every shred of decency out of him.
He tried to puke in the 14th hole and when I told him to stop he started chanting "hole in one hole in one"
I just sat in the bathtub with the shower running so I could eat the whole box of mega stuffed Oreos. What am I doing with my life
Maybe the problem is guy has to ask his wife if he can go out to lunch with his girlfriend for an hour...
He's talking about me being Slave Princess Leia and how he'll chain me up. I don't have the heart to point out that he would be Jabba in that scenario...Is it bad that his lack of SW knowledge is destroying my lady boner?
I think curling is the best thing to watch when you're baked.
I'M IN A SPINNING VORTEX OF SELF-HATRED AND HORNINESS
You know its a good morning when you wake up with blonde hair extensions in your pocket. . .
Just found a note on the bed that said "Dear mittens, had to leave early I'll be back soon."
WTF? Are you mittens?
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