You should've come with us, we're at Home Depot looking for men.
I feel like we're taking advantage of the fact that our R.A has cerebal palsey.
I have a page in my 2010 scrapbook dedicated to pictures of his cock.
He graduated with honors. I've seen him kneeboard on dry ground and run a razor scooter into a wall...anyone can graduate with honors
If you bring chipotle to my house i'll let you eat your burrito out of my vagina
I'm sick of being the only unemployed member of the group. Doing things alone isn't partying. Its sad.
Okay: Whipped cream, vodka, and a trampoline. This will either be really great, or really tragic.
He's under the table sobbing because he doesn't live in a taco if you ever get him this high again I will stab you
Please tell me you're not home alone watching Glitter.
Can you see in?
People try and tell me I never learn me lesson, well that's a bunch of crap. I asked for Monday off for Superbowl recovery based on my experience last year.
I'm experimenting with sincerity
It's only funny because he thinks you had sex with him to rob him.
How drunk are you?
Completed.
There's lube on my homework. #priorities
What do you mean you haven’t had the fantasy of getting anally penetrated by a tentacle monster?
Randomize
