Can we switch to phone sex? This is starting to get awkward...
i soberly give you permission to do that to me when im drunk
I swear that men would be more efficient if they had a semen gauge on their penises
Boys DO look like their dicks. Its like dogs.
I'm glad I get the same reaction from you for cookies and for my naked body
I'm sitting on the toilet just to avoid my bosses look of disapproval
Got high with dad and hunted squirrels in the basement. Is this seriously what my life has come to?
The bouncer was just about to kick Sarah out for getting with this guy 'too physically'. I told him that was 'her style' and he let them stay. Banter.
I have to sanitize my nipples and its just to cold in here for it to be ok
We'll just play it by vagina and see where it leads us
Talking to a customer about getting high and staring at glow in the dark wheels while there is a cop in the store. Just another day in Tampa
I see the guy who's been trying to get me to let him eat my ass became engaged on Facebook today; would framed screen shots be an appropriate wedding present?
It's a beautiful day to be high as fuck
I never thought I would encounter a situation that was "Too Gay" for me...and yet there I was.
I'm sorry, but the bed has won this battle. I got up, changed my shirt, combed my hair, put on some deodorant, and then looked at my bed and got back in
Randomize
