i might have gotten away with it if "don't tase me bro!" wasn't the first thing i said when i rolled down my window.
I have all these new brothers and sisters I'm just now finding out about
Tell me why Im cashing out of Walmart with Smirnoff and catfood
What's your middle initial? I need it for the census. I put us down as "unmarried partners."
Oh my god... you're gay. Ps, its A.
No no. According to the 2010 US Census, we're gay.
She was standing in the road flagging traffic in a tshirt and boxers. I didn't stop.
All she wanted was a cigarette
Obviously you've never slept with someone who was deliverance level inbred.
Ugh..Yesterday was a complete alcohol fueled shit show. Not making eye contact with anyone today. Don't deserve it. Eye contact is for decent people.
I think i'm going to homewreck at this Disney on Ice show.
All I see when I think of you are dancing penis angels around your head.
I put his pb&j sandwich in my bra and never looked back
He's 5'2" and his dick 4'8"
It involves me, my best friend, and a stripper and her mother.
i like coming up with different names when i reference that night. 'the night i got kicked out of the bar', 'the night i escaped from the hospital', 'the night we had that threeway'...
Its one of those days... someone might die
Would a picture of my dick help?
A piece of your chipped nail polish just fell out of my crotch.
Randomize
