his ringtone is the jonas brothers. get me the fuck out of here NOW.
I could be a Disney star with the amount of nude photos of mine that get leaked.
We were naked in his bed when he asked me "what should we do?"
he's washing the lighter in the sink and telling me to picture unicorns. requesting backup.
i take my contacts out every time we fuck so i cant see all the stretch marks
Puked up what appears to be battery acid next to the treadmill. Everyone noticed.
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
Traveling before 21 and traveling after 21 are two different things. There's a whole nother world of red white and blue weird out there
I know everytime I get my paycheck I'm like "I should probably renew my gym membership" and then I just buy more alcohol
I'm drinking nothing but vodka and coffee for the next 48 hours. For science.
$645 later, she's throwing up in my washroom and asking for a cab. Hooker are soooo much cheaper.
If my mom walks in on me masturbating one more time I'm moving out
You'd think the first few times would have been enough
You don't know true terror until you get stuck in a porta potty while frying your face off.
I just had a flashback to me puking and you telling me it was okay because my boobs still looked awesome.
Just paid for birth control in all ones do you think she is judging me?
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