Hi
Babe...You're really smothering me right now
The required reading for this week is a paper about birds called great tits. Let's see my TA keep a straight face through this discussion.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?!
she's throwing things again.. almost stabbed herself in the eye with a fork.
Then I realized I was alone sitting on the bathroom floor brushing my teeth at 2am laughing to myself.
The only reason we got away with streaking last time was cuz we had those miner hats
There's a treasure map on your stomach. Treasure may or may not be the clothes you lost...enjoy
That's what I'm here for. To bitch slap you into believing in yourself.
shes on the ground doing bicycle kicks screaming "is my ass good enough for you now satan" send help
Is it socially acceptable to stop at the strip club for the lunch buffet on my way to the airport?
He drops f bombs like every other word and he just gave me 127 shares of tmobile stock for free. I feel like I should pay him back in blow jobs or something.
fuck whipped cream. I'd eat vegetables off those abs
If a treadmill opens up I'll run next to him and then fall off so he has to give me mouth to mouth
As much as I want you to bang someone other than me, he is an asshole.
Also Fuck you Stephen King and Fuck the horse you rode in on, making me cry In front of my coworkers.
Randomize
