She was drunk and kept trying to talk while I was in her mouth. It sounded like the teacher from a Charlie Brown cartoon!
oral is when you put your mouth on someones privates and play moterboat or popsicle
My mom said she was relieved to see that I'd gained some weight bc she's "always worried" that I might have AIDS.
I've had enough of this chick, she wanted to cuddle after giving me a handjob. I feel like I'm in junior high
That's two mile stones in one shot. A ginger and that's my third ashley.
Showed up 2 hours late and still drunk nobody gave me a high five. This intership is bullshit.
Almost told my boss I was an expert aat swallowing when he questioned my ability to take excedrin,xanax, and a vitamin all at once. It was a medicinal gang bang lubricated by arizona tea.
Well if I'm going to hook up with every ethnicity by the end of undergrad, I need to be moving on
I am putting together a break up mix and its pretty much the best of Phil Collins
i mean hes a break dancing puerto rican, how do you think the sex was?
we're spending all day in bed drinking spiked eggnog and fucking
I walked over and you were apologizing to him because you're lady gaga and he's not. The best part was that he forgave you.
Someone needs to get Mark off the roof. I told you that he doesn’t shut up about ancient Egypt if you give him henny.
He was calculating the number of ceiling tiles when I was on top it was fucking rain man.
She picked a quarter off the floor, kissed it "for luck" and won the $20,000 jackpot. She bought dinner and stayed sober to drive us home. This is a typical example of a visit with my sister.
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