Saw a guy pass out and hit his head on a urinal. Laughing too hard to help him up
You know you're fucked up when you throw your phone on the roof of the bar to show how good the Otter Box works.
Maybe not, but you have to admit watching him get hit by the car was gratifying
Me too it's so nice. Debated studying out there but woulda been 90% babe-watching 5% flexing 3% studying and 2% talkin my boners down.
So coach him. No guy wants to admit being unsure of something in bed. It's a man-law or something.
Liz is crying about burritos again.
She makes him look at her naked pics before she sends them to someone she's actually going to fuck. I think this makes him mayor of the friend zone.
Walk of shame: Easter Edition. He is risen.
Hahahahaha. That's what your stoned ass gets for eating half a bag of processed cheese at 2am.
I quit life. I got pulled over on my way to work and they towed my car and dropped me off at work in a cop car
I'm supposed to nail the old lady at 1:30 so I'll see you at 1:35ish.
Nothing says I love you as your fiancé bringing back home your drunk brother from his own stag party
I also woke up in a guys bed in a Reptar shirt yesterday morning staring at a movie theater sized poster of the not as popular Air Bud franchise movie Super Buddies.
I just realized I have a habit of pre gaming for therapy visits. Problem?
We'll discuss it when you get here
Cheyanne in woods. Ducks attacked. My toe is bleeding. We are gpsing our way home on foot. No worries
Randomize
