I wish there was a Glade Plug-in for vaginas
Then my mouth guard fell out of the hole, so that's how the dog poop got in my mouth.
Waaait I'm alsleep in myt car somewhere
you said "tonight pinky, we take over the world" and then came in my face
I heard from multiple reliable sources that she doesn't have a gag reflex. Of course I'm going to try to go home with her.
your dad just showed up on the golfcart with a keg. i. love. our. neighborhood.
From the guy that lifted you into a fan I'm sorry
Those two lesbians inspired me. A whole new way to roll. Fuck shots. Gallons of vodka is the new tequila.
Well my sources tell me she just happens to appear in an episode girls gone wild.
I know someone that will spend hours looking for her. He also has many of said movies. And I will do it for free!
She had a tattoo on her pelvis that said "it's cock-o-clock" an had clocks and hot dogs exploding away from it. I'd like to tell you it was deal breaker buuuuuuut.......
I threw up in a pringles can. how do you think my night went.
you should never start the day with a boob text. It can only go downhill from there
I'm honestly wondering if my vagina did something to offend the universe
She swallowed the key to the cuffs, I've been having to explain the pink fuzz all morning.
I feel like the physical embodiment of the pot leaf eyes smiley face
Randomize
